Healing from Religious Abuse: Deeper Dive Part 2 with Andrea Wenburg & Rosanne Moore
In this episode of the Voice of Influence podcast, host Andrea and Rosanne Moore delve into a deeper discussion about Andrea’s interview with Anna LeBaron, who shared her traumatic experiences in a violent polygamist cult led by her father. They explore the concept of spiritual bypass and how Anna used religious practices to suppress emotional pain, before eventually addressing it.
They discuss the challenges of healing from deep trauma in layers, the importance of education and information exposure, and the role of memoirs like ‘Educated’ by Tara Westover. They also touch on cultural awareness raised by the docuseries ‘Shiny Happy People’ and the damaging control dynamics in high-control religious environments. The episode concludes with personal reflections on finding one’s voice and maintaining curiosity and openness in conversations, especially when discussing contentious or polarizing issues.
Mentioned in this Episode:
352: Escaping & Healing From a Violent Cult with Anna LeBaron & Ruth Wariner
353: Healing from Religious Abuse with Anna LeBaron
Book: The Polygamist’s Daughter by Anna LeBaron
Book: The Sound of Gravel by Ruth Wariner
Hulu Docuseries “Daughters of the Cult”
Book: Educated by Tara Westover
Prime Docuseries “Shiny Happy People”
00:00 Introduction and Recap
00:55 Understanding Spiritual Bypass
03:36 The Importance of Lament
07:17 Healing in Layers
12:49 The Role of Education in Healing
15:57 Navigating New Ideas and Beliefs
25:12 The Power of Listening First
26:31 Finding Your Voice: A Journey of Healing
27:35 Navigating the World of Dating After Abuse
31:41 Shiny Happy People: Exposing Spiritual Abuse
39:43 Bill Gothard and the IBLP: A Framework for Control
48:38 The Challenge of Self-Reflection and Growth
Summary
When Anna LeBaron shared her story of escaping a violent polygamist cult on the Voice of Influence podcast, it opened a window into the complex, layered journey of healing from spiritual abuse. In this final deep-dive conversation, Rosanne Moore and I unpacked Anna’s story and drew out key lessons on leadership, influence, and personal growth.
If you haven’t listened to the full conversation yet, I highly encourage you to catch up on the series starting with Anna’s interview. These insights can transform how we support others—and ourselves—through healing and empowerment.
Tune into the full episode to experience the conversation in depth!
The Hidden Trap of Spiritual Bypassing
Anna courageously shared how, after escaping the cult, she initially leaned on religious language to suppress her emotional pain rather than process it. “For a long time I was spiritually bypassing,” she said. “I was using faith to avoid facing the pain and trauma.”
Spiritual bypassing happens when we use spiritual beliefs or practices to sidestep difficult emotions or unresolved issues. As Rosanne noted, it’s not surprising Ana fell into this, having been taught from a young age to justify suffering through spiritual reasoning. True leadership and influence, especially within faith communities, must allow space for honesty, lament, and real emotional work. Without that, “you can’t grieve your grief—and you can’t fully experience your joy either.”
The takeaway? Strength isn’t pretending to be fine. True strength is facing the pain, being honest about it, and finding healing through vulnerability.
Healing Happens in Layers, Not in a Straight Line
Anna described her healing journey with a powerful metaphor: “Healing doesn’t happen all at once. It comes in layers like peeling an onion. You think you’ve dealt with something, and then another layer shows up.”
Trauma recovery isn’t linear. As Rosanne reflected, emotional wounds resurface at new stages of life—with parenting, grandparenting, or unexpected moments of grief. Pressuring ourselves or others to “move on” prematurely not only delays healing but deepens hidden wounds.
As I shared from my own experience, true emotional freedom sometimes comes after years of holding back. “One night is all it took—once I finally let myself lament—and it helped me open up again emotionally as a human.”
Patience, honesty, and self-compassion are essential companions on the path to recovery.
Information Control and the Courage to Find Your Own Voice
Anna’s connection to Tara Westover’s memoir Educated revealed how powerful it is to recognize your own story in someone else’s. Like Tara, Anna grew up in a system that controlled information to maintain power. As Rosanne pointed out, “Information control is a huge part of coercive control.”
Whether it’s in cults, abusive relationships, or authoritarian environments, restricting access to outside ideas and perspectives limits personal agency. And as Ana powerfully said, “For years, I didn’t even know I had a voice. Now I use it to help others find theirs.”
Finding your voice often starts with regaining trust in your own thoughts, feelings, and intuition—something every aspiring leader and influencer must cultivate.
Healing, influence, and leadership all require courage—the courage to face the truth, to stay curious, and to own our voices even when it’s uncomfortable. Anna’s story reminds us that these aren’t one-time achievements. They happen layer by layer, moment by moment.
Listen to the full Voice of Influence podcast episode to explore these themes more deeply and find inspiration for your own journey.
Give great, effective feedback!
This show is brought to you by the Deep Impact Method free course. Handle problems and present changes with care and influence. Register for the free 30-minute course here.